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I'm taking a different approach to this Two Week Wait.
The last few times, I spent a lot of energy trying to detect symptoms of pregnancy, visualizing fertilization and implantation, and just generally driving myself insane in the belief that I'm pregnant until proven otherwise.
This time is different. Hope and despair are not part of this equation. Instead of being all omgicouldbepregnantRIGHTNOW, I'm treating the whole thing as hypothetical.
I mean, ever since we started this odyssey, I've adapted my lifestyle to one that would support and sustain a healthy pregnancy. So it's not like I suddenly have to stop drinking alcohol or do anything else different over the next two weeks.
Since I already know that any "symptoms" I may have are down to the progesterone, I'm not going to worry about them. I'm going to carry on with my healthy regime, get stuck into the welcome pile of work that has appeared, and try not to freak out about anything at all.
While still doing the meditation and visualization exercises (which have become part of my routine), I'm going to try to hold the whole idea of pregnancy in a separate compartment from the rest of my life. I'm telling myself that, in two weeks I'll take a test that will tell me whether I'm pregnant. Until then, the pregnancy is entirely theoretical.
I know I'm not explaining this very well, but it seems to be working for me.
It's kind of like I've done the resume and had the job interview, now I'm just waiting to find out if they hired me. Nothing I can do at this point will change the outcome. There's no point in packing up my desk right now. Yes, I can make sure I'm ready to go if the call comes, but I've got my current job to keep me occupied just now.
That said, I am so tired. I was dozy all yesterday at work. I fell asleep during acupuncture. I crawled into bed when I got home and let K coddle me. Even though I had a good night's sleep last night, I'm STILL TIRED.
Fucking progesterone. *yawn*
M.
The last few times, I spent a lot of energy trying to detect symptoms of pregnancy, visualizing fertilization and implantation, and just generally driving myself insane in the belief that I'm pregnant until proven otherwise.
This time is different. Hope and despair are not part of this equation. Instead of being all omgicouldbepregnantRIGHTNOW, I'm treating the whole thing as hypothetical.
I mean, ever since we started this odyssey, I've adapted my lifestyle to one that would support and sustain a healthy pregnancy. So it's not like I suddenly have to stop drinking alcohol or do anything else different over the next two weeks.
Since I already know that any "symptoms" I may have are down to the progesterone, I'm not going to worry about them. I'm going to carry on with my healthy regime, get stuck into the welcome pile of work that has appeared, and try not to freak out about anything at all.
While still doing the meditation and visualization exercises (which have become part of my routine), I'm going to try to hold the whole idea of pregnancy in a separate compartment from the rest of my life. I'm telling myself that, in two weeks I'll take a test that will tell me whether I'm pregnant. Until then, the pregnancy is entirely theoretical.
I know I'm not explaining this very well, but it seems to be working for me.
It's kind of like I've done the resume and had the job interview, now I'm just waiting to find out if they hired me. Nothing I can do at this point will change the outcome. There's no point in packing up my desk right now. Yes, I can make sure I'm ready to go if the call comes, but I've got my current job to keep me occupied just now.
That said, I am so tired. I was dozy all yesterday at work. I fell asleep during acupuncture. I crawled into bed when I got home and let K coddle me. Even though I had a good night's sleep last night, I'm STILL TIRED.
Fucking progesterone. *yawn*
M.